Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s finally here! That adrenaline-pumping, bone-crunching, mind-boggling, all-out brawl night we’ve all been waiting for. That’s right, grab your popcorn and brace yourselves because UFC Fight Night: UFC 287 Pereira vs. Adesanya 2 is going down tonight! A spectacular rematch you don’t want to miss. Now, strap in as we walk you through everything you need to know, from how to watch to getting the most expensive popcorn on planet earth. Buckle up, buttercups, and let’s do this!

So, what’s the 411? (Do people still say that? We’re making it a thing again). Tonight is THE night as Alex Pereira (our first-class Brazilian champ) is squaring off against Israel Adesanya (Nigerian-born knockout machine) in a fight for the ages. The best part? You don’t even need to time travel to witness the carnage! Mark those calendars because it’s happening TONIGHT. Yeah, you read that right, clear your schedules, fluff up those cushions, and prepare to be entertained.

“But wait, there’s more!” (infomercial voice). No, really, there is. So when do we get to witness this epic clash of the titans? Don’t worry, eager beavers; the pre-fight shenanigans kick off at 7 PM ET, with the main event walking us into the octagon at 10 PM ET sharp. Can’t be bothered to calculate what that means in your time zone? No problem, my little globetrotter, Google has your back.

If you want a firsthand glimpse of the madness and have deep pockets, feel free to try your luck at getting one of the last remaining tickets to see the battle unfold live. Beware though, tickets are rarer than a Yeti sighting, and you may need to be prepared to shell out some serious dough to secure one. I’d call it worth it, though, wouldn’t you?

But what if you’re one of those sane people who don’t fancy spending a small fortune to sit in a crowded arena surrounded by shouting, beer-chugging aficionados? Fret not, my friend; we got you covered. This spectacle of fists and fury can be streamed live on ESPN+ in the good ol’ US of A, BT Sport in the United Kingdom, and UFC Fight Pass worldwide! All from the comfort of your very own living room (or whatever place you’ve managed to hunker down in).

Here’s the thing, folks; we’ve all had a pretty rough time recently, haven’t we? And there’s nothing quite like two professional bruisers beating the living daylights out of each other to remind us that life is still an epic adventure full of sweat, blood, and sweet, sweet victory. It’s high time we relished in that a little bit.

So whether you’re Team Pereira, Team Adesanya, or Team “I-Just-Love-Watching-People-Fight” (we see you), make sure you’ve got your screens primed and your hearts steeled for this rollercoaster of an event. As always, make sure you have those drinks iced, your takeout menu of choice handy, and plenty of throat lozenges ready for all that yelling at the screen you’re about to do.

Fight on, my warriors. And may the odds be ever in your favor. (Wrong franchise? Eh, who cares? We’re rebels).